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Literature Text
Q: Robin and Starfire’s first fight after becoming a couple.
Starfire and Robin remained silent.
“It was the stupidest fight ever” Raven spoke.
“You mean the funniest” Beast Boy laughed shortly.
“It was over nothing basically” Cyborg shrugged.
The video changed views, the movie was recorded obviously from above. Starfire and Raven (reading a book) were sitting on the sofa, while Robin was flailing about all over the main room and Beast Boy waited for popcorn to get ready in the kitchen area.
“Where the fvck is it?!” Robin yelled, searching through the room.
“Boyfriend Robin, please, just take another TV remote and sit down” Starfire requested, irritation slightly audible in her voice.
“It was the last one, Star!” Robin yelled then ran to the sofa and ushered the girls away muttering unpleasant 'get up, get up, get up' to search through the cushions.
“You know you could just get up and…” Raven was cut off by Robin’s irritated snarl. She muttered ‘nevermind’ and got back to reading.
“You already searched here” Starfire reminded in a sing-songe tone. Robin shot her a look.
“Maybe instead of telling me where I’ve searched, you could actually help me looking for it?!” he barked at her.
“I have told you where it is, you just…”
“It’s not in the fridge” he said through clenched teeth. Starfire let out and aggravated groan and fell back on her spot next to Raven (who jumped a little at that). Robin froze in place and then turned back to his girlfriend.
“What was that?” he demanded.
“What was what, boyfriend-…?”
“You know what! You groaned at me! It’s not the first time today, not even this week! What do you mean by that stupid groan?!” He stood over her, arms crossed on his chest.
“Maybe it’s just that you never seem to listen to me!“ Starfire said loftily.
Raven’s book went down on her lap. She glanced at the two.
”Oh, I’m sorry I don’t like to listen about a freakin’ dress you saw at the mall!” he yelled. Starfire stood up from her place on the sofa.
“I do not always talk about the mall of shopping! I do happen to tell you important things that you happen not to remember afterwards!”
Beast Boy walked to the sofa with a bowl of popcorn in his hands and stood next to Raven, staring at the couple.
“Well, maybe I don’t listen because you’re not supportive of me!!”
“Excuse me! I am so, very much supportive of you!”
“What’s happening?” Beast Boy asked dumbfounded. Only now Raven noticed him and took the bowl from his hands saying ‘good, snacks’ and began eating. Soon he sat next to her and followed her suit.
“No! Saying ‘don’t work so hard’ and ‘work can wait’ isn’t being supportive!”
“Is it so bad that I care for your wellbeing?!”
“Maybe I don’t need your care!!”
“Robin, you are obsessed!”
“Well, maybe I am! Bear with me!”
Cyborg walked in and his jaw dropped to the floor while they were yelling at each other’s faces about Slade, obsessions, feelings and situations that had only transpired between them. They weren’t even waiting for the other to finish their sentence. It was like watching two wild cats at each other’s throats.
“Whoa, what’s going on?” Cyborg asked, walking to Raven and Beast Boy.
“Cy, I think the team’s ending” Beast Boy said, his voice breaking.
“But you’ll adopt us, right?” Raven asked and at exactly that moment TV screen exploded with black power. They all (including Robin and Starfire) looked at her.
“Sorry, couldn’t hold it any longer” she explained, pushing another handfull of popcorn into her mouth,and then muttering something about getting fat.
“Hey, you two, what’s this all about?” Cyborg said and they both began screaming again, this time to explain their point of view to their friend. He outshouted them and they went silent. Star was all in tears while steam was coming out of Robin’s ears.
“Okay, I didn’t understand a word. Starfire, go.”
“Robin was searching for the remote of the TV and then he was accusing me and screaming at me and…” she explained, choking once in a while on her tears.
“I just wanted to spend some nice time with you, watch a movie…” Robin said, but she cut him off.
“You don’t even need the remote to watch a movie, Robin! You can just stand up and…!”
“Okay, Star, you’re a girl, you don’t get it!” he cut her off.
“Oh, so now suddenly I am a girl, and… and alien, and w-what, all sorts of different from you?!” she yelled, sniffing. Robin turned to Cyborg.
“Now tell me, when’d I say that, huh?!” he threw his hands in the air.
“Star, you’re overreacting a little” Cyborg said gently.
“But he does not listen to me! I told him the remote was in the fridge!”
”I looked into the stupid fridge, and it wasn’t there” Robin said through clenched teeth.
“You didn’t look about!” she accused. Robin groaned and headed to the kitchen.
“Fine. I’ll look about.” He said, opening the fridge. “But who would put the remote…” he cut off and took out a TV remote. “… in the fridge” he finished, thunderstruck. He turned around to see Starfire’s wet, yet furious eyes, Cyborg shook his head slowly, eyes judging and unforgiving. Beast Boy with the same look on his face rolled his arms and cracked his neck as if preparing to whoop his ass. Only Raven’s face didn’t flinch with any kind of emotion.
“I had told you before” Starfire said, still sniffing. “We always eat snacks while watching a movie. And I saw friend Cyborg put it in there this morning~!” she finished, bursting into more tears and ran out of the room. Robin still with the remote in hand couldn’t even utter a word. He looked at his friends, their faces unchanged.
“Dude” Beast Boy began “You made Star cry.”
“You gotta pay” Cyborg finished, punching his metal fist into his open hand. Robin backed away one step when suddenly Raven’s powers grabbed his ankle. He let out one short shout and was hung upside down.
“Now be a good birdbrain” Raven said. “Go buy her flowers, chocolates, book a table in the best restaurant there is in Jump, book two tickets to some romantic comedy crap to which you won’t need any stupid remote, buy her the dress she was talking about, and matching shoes. Go.”
She released him without remorse looking as he hit his head on the floor and scoop himself together to the door (losing the remote somewhere on the way).
“And buy her some nice necklace” she said after him. He raised a hand to let her know he got it. “No pearls.” A hand raised again. “And matching earrings, and a bracelet. Oh, you know what? Buy her a tiara.” Robin disappeared in the door. “And pray to all the gods you know that she’ll stay with you!!!” she screamed then sighed heavily.
“Dude! What’d you do that for, Rae?!” Beast Boy asked audibly irked.
“Yeah! I wanted to booyah his ass right away! I demand it!”
“He made our Star cry!” Beast Boy added.
“Believe me, if his wounds will be fresh, she’ll show you even more gratitude. And did you just use ‘booyah’ as a verb?”
Cyborg didn’t answer because they heard a throat cleaning. Robin’s head was picking out of the door way.
“Raven, what’s her shoe size?”
Raven groaned.
“For Azar’s love, even I would be a better boyfriend than you” she said, walking to his side.
“I only need the shoe size, you don’t have to come with me” he muttered.
“Oh, really?” she asked, still walking towards him. “Her favorite flowers?” Robin stammered. “Do you know what dress she was talking about?” He stuttered. “And you’ll need me with the romantic comedy, and with the restaurant and with everything else” she recited. “Now come on. We also need new TV, you guys won’t live without it.” She looked significantly at the two remaining boys and rolled her eyes. “Cyborg, we’re taking the car” she announced and then the door closed behind them.
“Dude, she booyahed him” Beast Boy said.
“I knew it would take root” Cyborg grinned.
The video changed to the Titans sitting now on the couch.
“The conclusion is…” Robin started.
“Raven should be my boyfriend” Starfire finished for him, making them look at her. She remained still with a grin glued to her face.
